By popular demand��..
An English class essay of mine.

I see strings the size of ropes. The fraying of this cover is my savior. Rocking side to side I am now able to grasp the ropes. With no hands to grasp I recall the "Itsy Bitsy Spider" song from my youth. I giggle as I right myself.

This new world is so strange yet so familiar. Standing here on my wire legs I scan my surroundings and gasp in wonder. I can see things behind me without straining my neck. The strangest sensation is a feeling I have never had before. I can see feel taste touch and smell all thru the spear like protrusion in my head. I can wiggle them and perhaps even cross them. No, that wasn't a good idea as I envision myself as how one of the nuclear accelerators would feel in "Ghostbusters" Obviously they are not meant to do tricks with.

I must explore this strange new world. My first attempt at walking succeeds in my landing flat on my tummy, tripped by my own 6 feet. Logically, walking is not meant to be in order that I knew it. Left and right in threesomes worked liked dancing on ice without skates. I figure a new order and off I go exploring.

As I approach the horizon, with the covers draped to the floor I wonder how insects climb vertical. I take a deep breath and start my descent, slow at first. I get this figured out and everything is going well until some idiot turns the light on. I can't see from this blinding light and them damn antennae are not quit tuned for me. Cautiously I scale the cover to the familiar flat area on the top of the bed.

A deafening sound and suddenly I am airborne as my grip failed when the covers were ruffled. "Look Ma, I'm a B52 flying fortress. Zoom Rat-a-tat-tat. Pilot to bombardier, bombs away", as I recall youthful dreams as I ace pilot. Splat. Ouch. The crushing sound of corn chips and rushing pain ripple thru me. I've discovered how hard flowers pasted on plaster can be. The flowers now rush by with stems looking like a picket fence. The ground, the ground is rushing to me!

The aroma of boiled hops and the bubbles fill this glass. Saved by the beer that is mine, and just in nick of time. Hic. Oh excuse me, must be something I drank. The carbonated foam tickles my tummy and spins my thoughts into a drunken rhyme.

I swim around as fast as I'm able,
Engulfed in this beer left on the table.
As I swim and swim upside down,
I am drinking this beer I have found.

As enjoyable to you as this does sound.
My biggest fear is that I might drown.
The glass is raised and the beer flows down.
To be eaten alive, tis better then drown.

Over the teeth and past the gum.
Lookout tummy here I come.
Down the throat of the mine shaft,
Tumbling down in this armored craft.

I splash in the muck next to this log,
My legs scrambling to scale this hot dog.
Digesting my last bit of hope it seems,
To be somehow awoken from this dream.

The dark caverns encountering the bowels.
Vomit and bile gosh do I need some towels.
Everywhere I see the fruits of ones meals.
I know now how a hamburger feels.
Being pushed down this roughage track.
I stop in the bowels with a headfirst smack.

Pressure around me builds to my upcoming fate.
My kind of luck a bowel movement this date.
Squished and pushed I exit with a splash again.
My life's is now in the toilet my again.

Swim! Swim and safe my poor old soul.
How I wish I could again be whole.
Darkness again with a stench of gloom.
My life will end in a throne in this room.

I awake in a pool of my own dreams sweat. Alone, hung over, the taste of bile I've met. I am human and survived with a scream. I lived a big life as a dream; I vow never to have another beer and ice cream.

This is the abbreviated long version.